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Close friend is in Hospice

Posted: Mon Dec 28, 2020 6:12 pm
by FlyingPenguin
I apologize if I'm in a crappy mood this week. A very dear friend, like a sister to me the last 30 years, just got transferred to hospice. Not covid related, but she's had a breathing disorder and been on oxygen for the past two years. She's been working up until last week (bookkeeper for a doctor's office, and they've been letting her work from home the past few months) and was thinking about retiring in January and moving to assisted living.

Seems her liver is failing, rather suddenly. She's quite pissed off that she hadn't been able to close out the books for the company for the year before getting ill. Full of piss and vinegar that one. I half expect her to recover just so she can close out the month and turn in a proper resignation :)

Tried to do at home hospice at my house, but her oxygen requirements are higher than they can provide at home, at least for now.

Going to be a crappy week, but I am determined to have her live past New Years so this doesn't end up being the last insult of 2020.

Screw 2020.

Re: Close friend is in Hospice

Posted: Mon Dec 28, 2020 6:52 pm
by Executioner
Sorry to hear. I was in the same boat last week when my best buddy in high school passed away at 65 with cancer. He was on Facebook, but never answered any of my info I posted at his page. I did not think anything of it, and I received a message from his wife that he passed way in October. If I would have known that he was battling cancer, I would have flown to New York to see him, but the fucking virus killed that option for me.

We had some good times when we were teens and entering into our 20's. He helped me get my first full time job, and we also moved out together and got our first 3 bedroom rental with another guy. It was party haven until he decided to join the Army. After he got out, he decided to move to New York and I never saw or heard from him again. He did come to my old place in Hemet CA to visit his father who was 90+ and having health issues. I had no idea that his father lived only a few blocks from where I was living. That was about 10 years ago.

Re: Close friend is in Hospice

Posted: Mon Dec 28, 2020 10:35 pm
by reno
to both of you so sorry to hear these story's. prays .

Re: Close friend is in Hospice

Posted: Tue Dec 29, 2020 6:51 pm
by FlyingPenguin
She passed this morning. I barely got there in time to see her go. At 7:30 she was lucid and the nurse called to ask me a few questions. I was planning on seeing her at 11 but at 9:30 the nurse called and said I'd better get over there right now because they didn't think she would last the hour. She passed 15 minutes after I got there. :(

Re: Close friend is in Hospice

Posted: Tue Dec 29, 2020 10:22 pm
by GuardianAsher
My thoughts and prayers to you and her, FP. I'm happy that you at least got to see her before she passed, but damn....

Screw 2020 should be the catch phrase of the year.

Re: Close friend is in Hospice

Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2020 9:33 pm
by Losbot
My condolences to both of you. This has been a crappy year. Lost a close friend on Dec 4th, thanks to 2 idiots that were racing their cars. Once of them plowed into my friend's vehicle, killing him on the scene. He was about 3 blocks from home. This year has by far been a complete piece of shit.

Re: Close friend is in Hospice

Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2020 10:58 pm
by psypher
Sorry to hear, thoughts and prayers for you and her family. 2020 has just sucked all around. It couldn't even end before taking a shot at my mom. Will find out more next week.

Re: Close friend is in Hospice

Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2021 3:54 pm
by darcy
My very deepest condolences to you, FP, Exec, and Losbot.
Everything just sucks.
,, we lost 4 friends within less than 3 months (non-Covid); the last, just before Christmas ( father of my husband's Godson ).

Re: Close friend is in Hospice

Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2021 4:35 pm
by FlyingPenguin
That's Darcy, and sorry for your loss.

Some people have asked if there will be a service, but I don't think anyone would feel entirely comfortable, even if we had a celebration of life outdoors.

My plan is to put it off until later in the year, and maybe have a combination celebration of life / screw 2020 party.

Re: Close friend is in Hospice

Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2021 7:03 pm
by darcy
Thank you very much, FP.

Of the 4, my husband felt relatively "safe" attending only 1 service, due to size of location, rotation of persons allowed, etc. ( This was a childhood friend who drove a school bus that was hit by a trailer; children were in the bus; he was very much injured, but sang to them until help arrived, then passed from injuries several days later.). The others were held on days too close to Thanksgiving and Christmas, when the two of us drove up and stayed with my 90-yr Mom; we allowed 14 days before traveling to Mom to make sure we were "ok".
I was nervous about him attending that one service. I reckon it wise that you are putting it off until later in the year.

Re: Close friend is in Hospice

Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2021 9:21 pm
by reno
sorry for your loss FP. prayer's for you and her family .