Wife From Hell

Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk, post your joke of the day. And cheer up will ya!
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renovation
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Wife From Hell

Post by renovation »

A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir." The driver says, "Gee, officer I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating."


Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: "Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise control."


As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, "Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once?"


The wife smiles demurely and says, "You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did."


As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, "Darn it, woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?"


The officer frowns and says, "And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine." The driver says, "Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket."


The wife says, "Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving."


And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, "WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??"


The officer looks over at the woman and asks, "Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?"


(I love this part….)




"Only when he's been drinking."
the Last time I was Talking to myself . I got into such a heated argument . that is why I swore I never talk to that guy again. you know what it worked now no buddy talking to me. :help
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DoPeY5007
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Post by DoPeY5007 »

Oldie but goodie :)
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"I'm seriously going to pummel you until you purr like a bitch-kitten!!"
Redmeda
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Post by Redmeda »

Oh Gawsh... haha
How Did The Cat Get So Fat?
("\(@.@)/")
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