it's so hot this August !

Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk, post your joke of the day. And cheer up will ya!
Post Reply
User avatar
reno
The artist formerly known as Renovation
Posts: 1781
Joined: Wed Feb 17, 2016 10:35 pm

it's so hot this August !

Post by reno »

...the birds have to use potholders to pull the worms out of the ground.

......the trees are whistling for the dogs.

.....the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.

.....hot water comes from both taps.

.....you can make sun tea instantly.

.....you learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.

......the temperature drops below 90 F and you feel a little chilly.

.....you discover that in July it only takes two fingers to steer your car.

.....you discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.

.....you actually burn your hand opening the car door.

.....you break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 A.M.

.....your biggest motorcycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and
end up lying on the pavement and cook to death"?

.....you realize that asphalt has a liquid stage.

.....the potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out
and add butter.

.....the cows are giving evaporated milk.

.....farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.


IT'S SO DRY that the Baptists are starting to baptize by sprinkling, the Methodists
are using wet-wipes, the Presbyterians are giving rain checks, and the Catholics are
praying for the wine to turn back into water!
User avatar
darcy
Posts: 6263
Joined: Tue Jun 01, 2004 9:33 pm
Location: NYC

Re: it's so hot this August !

Post by darcy »

:) :)
Briquette, 1992 - 2008 ~ < Forever In Our Hearts >

Lily, 1995 - 2009 ~ < Forever In Our Hearts >

The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched.
They must be felt with the heart. ~ Helen Keller.
User avatar
normalicy
Posts: 9513
Joined: Sat Nov 25, 2000 4:04 am
Location: St. Louis, MO USA
Contact:

Re: it's so hot this August !

Post by normalicy »

.....the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
This it totally me. I find the tiniest bit of shade and I'm under it. Probably doesn't help having a black on black truck.
Post Reply